tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63961652011-04-21T18:40:55.028-04:00I coulda did my time...bronx expatnoreply@blogger.comBlogger7351100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1144478626601670612006-04-08T02:34:00.000-04:002006-04-08T02:43:46.613-04:00

My girl's lil bro is a archictect. Tonight I shared with her how one evening I ran of theatre 80 (St Marks) before the jury dropped the verdict on Howard Rourke. She focused on the part of the story where I was alone with a forty in a movie theater rtather than my desire to avoid ruining the book I hadn't finished. So tonight I dropped into B&N for a copy of the Ayn Rand polemic (f*in

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1133507092230621612005-12-02T02:04:00.000-05:002005-12-02T02:04:52.236-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1133507027288722102005-12-02T02:03:00.001-05:002005-12-02T02:03:47.296-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1133506980698774832005-12-02T02:03:00.000-05:002005-12-02T02:03:00.706-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1133506977311549372005-12-02T02:02:00.000-05:002005-12-02T02:02:57.316-05:00

one out 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1133506898357052182005-12-02T01:54:00.000-05:002005-12-02T02:01:38.370-05:00

Billy Joel appeared on Conan. I watched from my couch next to the dry cleaning pile. Billy informed the faux-incredulous Conan that he (Billy) was Jewish. Billy explained that he had Italian friends, that he went to mass when he was bored on Saturday (really, I think he said Saturday, so he musta been being honest), and that every girl that broke his heart was Irish. Conan dropped really

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1127537254963355182005-09-24T00:47:00.000-04:002005-09-24T00:47:35.006-04:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1121313933524252122005-07-14T00:04:00.000-04:002005-07-14T00:05:33.530-04:00

hamsun's nato beachboys

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1120711250443841552005-07-07T00:33:00.000-04:002005-07-07T00:42:26.450-04:00

Please, please, please, convene a new two-year grand jury after 120 days. Then she can pose her self righteous look-at-me-and-my-media-covering-media-exposure pose as she protects Mr. Roves's chess piece employees for another 24 months. Press confidentiality is a loud trumpet when you are protecting the whistleblower against the man, but when you are protecting the man from retaliating against

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1120709187365444652005-07-06T23:46:00.000-04:002005-07-07T00:21:17.006-04:00

Today I met the fat white Sikh guy who works as a conductor for the MTA. I wouldn't have noticed him if he hadn't slammed his gian bag into my shoulder while opening the very last door of the 4 train door in order to save his large body a few steps.Here he is.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1120708001688099712005-07-06T23:39:00.000-04:002005-07-06T23:46:41.693-04:00

Today I met Leslie Crocker Snyder. She was campaigning outside the 86th Street Lexington Avenue line for Manhattan DA. When they asked me if I was a registered Democrat, I told 'em I recently moved to the Bronx. Leslie stuck it out in the rain. I know because I waited out the rain in the Barnes and Noble. Morgenthau, who is made of cardboard, could never have accomplished that task. Morgie

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119774557421613392005-06-26T04:29:00.000-04:002005-06-26T04:29:17.733-04:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119768226860728472005-06-26T02:34:00.000-04:002005-06-26T04:44:24.013-04:00

Has Bernardino turned into Chico Bail Bonds' Bad News Bernie? He looked sloppy and bored and silly out there today. But who don't like Bernie?I support Bernie like all the doofuses that yellow ribbon 'support our troops' magnets on their vehicles. Actually, I lend Bernie more support than the magnet buyers support the troops. I pay money to watch him not pay attention. I scoop up cheezy

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119767418738785302005-06-26T02:13:00.000-04:002005-06-26T02:34:33.226-04:00

I met the brother of some rockstars and he got me into their show and was very nice.He was not very rockstarish. He was kinda like an Ewok version of Jack Osbourne, but a bit more schlubby. Nevertheless, he did hook it up and was very nice to me and mine while we floated on his dime. Unfortuately, I didn't get a chance to really meet him. I was twisted and kept yelling at him that he should

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119766184999127962005-06-26T01:35:00.000-04:002005-06-26T02:09:45.076-04:00

My friend just asked me if I was addicted to Lucozade. I have several empty bottles around the house. At $1.75 a bottle it would be expensive habit. Pricewise/Highwise you may as well go with the heroin. The larger size bottles of Lucozade turn instantly flat upon opening. You can't even pour one glass with bubbles. I stick with the small $1.75 jammies. I don't know if I have a Lucozade

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119763618240502852005-06-26T01:26:00.000-04:002005-06-26T01:26:58.246-04:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119763520257278632005-06-26T01:25:00.000-04:002005-06-26T01:25:20.356-04:00

Fred votes guilty. 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119534747286675492005-06-23T09:50:00.000-04:002005-06-23T09:52:27.303-04:00

"Large. Dark. No sugar.""Coffee?""You keep your large dark to yourself. Okay?"

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119469893731428732005-06-22T15:44:00.000-04:002005-06-22T15:51:33.736-04:00

Leaving the game early to go back to work when a little little yellow shirted staff kid rudely confronts saying I can't leave through the exit I am already more than halfway through."You kidding me?""No!""What? I'm already out here. Look.""I don't haff to look! You going back inside to Gate 2.""Yeah. What are you gonna do throw me out?...Drag me back inside to throw me out?... See ya,

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119445845081861312005-06-22T09:09:00.000-04:002005-06-22T09:10:45.086-04:00

What cosmic force placed Tiger Woods and Kevin James next to each other at Yankee Stadium last night?

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119359217173541182005-06-21T08:54:00.000-04:002005-06-21T09:11:32.156-04:00

A little kid on his bike picked on me. He was riding in the middle of the street with another boy when I noticed he was repeating the same two syllables in my direction. Just as I turned to see what was going on, he stood on his peddles, let loose his best Ha! Ha!, and peddled off.Just then I realized he was saying "nice suit," in much the same way as the phrase "nice head" was employed when I

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119306707334115042005-06-20T18:23:00.000-04:002005-06-20T18:31:47.340-04:00

The short bald guy in the Dymanex polo shirt told two people today that he was gonna crack their skull open. One guy was a work colleague who told him he should not be sleeping at work. The second guy was a 'white guy' on the subway who bumped into him.When I heard that white guy's don't say shit to him I exhaled alot of smoke that blew over on him and waited to see what kind of reacton I'd

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1119275262084778492005-06-20T09:41:00.000-04:002005-06-20T09:47:42.090-04:00

Someone turned the "Happy Birthday, Liam" I wrote on a bathroom wall into "Happy Birthday, Ham."

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118934568474711842005-06-16T11:05:00.000-04:002005-06-16T11:09:28.476-04:00

Thank you person who yelled, "Mmmmm, Marshmallow!" precisely when the Stadium crowd focused its attention on the very large man catching a foul ball.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118934244721469652005-06-16T10:56:00.000-04:002005-06-16T11:04:04.726-04:00

"Your sign sucks!""You suck!" "What does it mean?""It means you're a jerkoff! A dumb loud drunk jerkoff trapped in a little man's body!"

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118764015869301362005-06-14T11:42:00.000-04:002005-06-14T11:46:55.876-04:00

I just went to the Stadium Box Office. They told me $5 tickets for Thursday were sold out. So I went on-line and bought one $5 ticket from ticketmaster. Total cost for $5 ticket?$13.65.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118701145785774362005-06-13T18:15:00.000-04:002005-06-13T18:19:05.790-04:00

Everyday I walk back the same parked white Toyota jeep with heavily tinted windows. The back windshield has a large buck with the words "Born to Bowhunt!" across the top in violent jagged letters. Today, for the first time, I noticed a "Got Shitzu?" logo and shitzu dog icon on the back side window. Tomorrow I will check out the street side rear window.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118509233579647682005-06-11T13:00:00.000-04:002005-06-11T13:00:33.586-04:00

Mom: We’re not going to Hershey Park. We’re going to Jamaica.Son: Do they have characters in Jamaica like in Disney?

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118486299125235092005-06-11T06:38:00.000-04:002005-06-11T06:38:19.193-04:00

boston fan upset (as team wins?) 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118402657119624272005-06-10T07:24:00.000-04:002005-06-10T07:24:17.123-04:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118402634034883432005-06-10T07:23:00.000-04:002005-06-10T07:23:54.096-04:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1118340888686130792005-06-09T13:53:00.000-04:002005-06-09T14:14:48.703-04:00

Today on the 4 train a hairy-lipped teenage coquita got on, stood next to me in the doorway, and said "You get out my f'ing face. You f'ing stupid f'. She repeated various alternate patterns of the words f' and stupid several more times in a rather upset tone that was magnified by her exagerrated arm-fold and leaning aganist the door. She was facing me as she spoke, but I kept reading and

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1111202795305973132005-03-18T22:26:00.000-05:002005-03-18T22:26:35.306-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1111202723915168502005-03-18T22:25:00.000-05:002005-03-18T22:25:23.916-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1111202628965748952005-03-18T22:23:00.000-05:002005-03-18T22:23:48.966-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1108276120017677032005-02-13T01:09:00.000-05:002005-02-13T01:28:40.020-05:00

I won't tell you about the girl who came to see my apartment while eating a pint of Ben & Jerry's chocolate ice cream. What else can I tell you? My last post from here. Somebody took the place. I am moving to the opposite end of the IRT from where I grew up at. As I walked briskly by the bars hoping to make a train back into the city I saw a giant raccoon tonight. Whe I got on the train I

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1107676623251344102005-02-06T02:25:00.000-05:002005-02-06T02:57:03.250-05:00

I'm showing my apartment. Seeking to escape the city. Moving to the glorious boro that hosted the glorious first three years of my life and hoping to find some other sucker to take over my over-priced relatively cheap apartment so I can do so with less bother. I posted the post and said no to the parasitic brokers who called within three minutes. I couldn't pass up the chance to survey the

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1107674572354582432005-02-06T02:22:00.000-05:002005-02-06T02:25:16.700-05:00

"I wouldn't fight in New York," Judah said. "See what happens when you come home? I ain't stupid."  

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1107321085191613092005-02-02T00:11:00.000-05:002005-02-02T00:11:25.190-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1107320864070593162005-02-02T00:07:00.000-05:002005-02-02T00:07:44.070-05:00

they got gi joe? 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1106290111871452202005-01-21T01:39:00.000-05:002005-01-21T01:48:31.870-05:00

A suit on the train gave me a sheepish out of place look. I was late and shared the train with the suit, another suit with middle-aged small time lawyer guy beard, and a wheezing overwight black guy who had trouble keeping the beat with his walkman music, which I hear from the other end of the car. The black guy kept tapping his spanking new construction boots off beat. It was

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1106182596677489322005-01-19T19:38:00.000-05:002005-01-19T20:30:12.316-05:00

I had a rabbit named MaryPat when I was a kid. No. Not in the biblical sense. I say I had the rabbit, but it spent its evenings with my sisters in their bedroom. The rabbit name of MaryPat demonstrates a certain Irish lack of creativity (aside from Bono, the Edge, and those wierd-sounding Irish language names that are really just pulled from a book or plucked off a relative). Everybody

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1106106640664144292005-01-18T22:50:00.000-05:002005-01-18T22:50:40.666-05:00

Nine hours of testimony and NOBODY asks about the haircut? 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1106102290056202882005-01-18T21:37:00.000-05:002005-01-18T21:38:10.056-05:00

Why do the Jihad guys go for the Archbishop of Iraq? They shoulda grabbed Shanley and took his head.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1106102210662233292005-01-18T21:27:00.000-05:002005-01-18T21:36:50.663-05:00

There was a giant double-bagged brown rope-handled shopping bag full of no less than eight huge shrink-wrapped packs of toretellini and some other giant packages that said mozzarella-something in the tiny foyer of my buildings first floor lobby all weekend. When I say huge tortellini packs I mean at least 64 tortellini in each pack. I did not want to get caught picking through the bag of

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105842893015552852005-01-15T21:34:00.000-05:002005-01-15T21:34:53.016-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105842816106995742005-01-15T21:33:00.000-05:002005-01-15T21:33:36.106-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105839552072452392005-01-15T20:39:00.000-05:002005-01-15T20:39:12.073-05:00

Today I had the pleasure of watching two greena and white colored teams lose after holding the lead for much of the game. The first team was the Manhattan College Jaspers. They lost to Jim Roland and Iona (basically, #44 Ed Jenkins), after Big Jim took off his suit jacket when his team was 15 do or so down. Next green and whit loss was the Jets. Now I know how the Sox fans used to feel after

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105755216874106682005-01-14T21:13:00.000-05:002005-01-14T21:13:36.873-05:00

While waiting in line at the 34th Street Post Office to post Christmas packages to Ireland (last time I send books abroad), I finally found out the meaning of the initials R.F. on the ceiling. A bored Postal Police Officer first gave me a xerox pamphlet about the history of the building, then refused to let me keep the copy and then after conferring with the pamphlet keeper at he end of the hall

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105753344910584302005-01-14T20:27:00.000-05:002005-01-14T21:04:20.650-05:00

As I walked up the steps to the 4 platform I deliberately avoided the group of young homeboys walking in a tightly synchronized barbarian pillage chaos formation as they shouted with bravado about the fight that almost was and what they would coulda shoulda done. They were just kids, but they were loud and I wanted some peace on the subway home. So I squirmed through them and made my way to

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105752439610303002005-01-14T20:19:00.000-05:002005-01-14T20:27:19.610-05:00

This morning I woke up after dreaming that I was proofreading the lyrics to a Ramones album liner. The only thing I remember aside from there being a completely alternate set of lyrics to "I wanna be sedated" was the emption reluctant gotta do it feeling as I considered how to tell the powers that be about the problem and avoid being somehow blamed for it.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105751736354031802005-01-14T20:15:00.000-05:002005-01-14T20:18:09.800-05:00

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105751618543019102005-01-14T20:13:00.000-05:002005-01-14T20:18:40.076-05:00

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105715642432508172005-01-14T10:11:00.000-05:002005-01-14T10:14:02.433-05:00

Someone at the 116th Street branch of Banco Popular called my cell phone three times while I was in the shower this morning and hung up each time. I wonder if they know the old lady and her homecare attendant.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105707039209004012005-01-14T07:45:00.000-05:002005-01-14T07:52:25.220-05:00

A neighbor has apparently given up on six full boxes of frozen pancakes. The unopened boxes were in the trash can down the hall. Somebody forgot they lived in a tiny Manhattan studio apartment on their last visit to Costco or BJ's.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105201952152956342005-01-08T11:32:00.000-05:002005-01-08T11:32:32.153-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105201905409320552005-01-08T11:31:00.000-05:002005-01-08T11:31:45.410-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1105120059515988192005-01-07T13:44:00.000-05:002005-01-07T12:47:39.516-05:00

The old lady and her caribbean home care attendant at (212) 873-73... have been calling me again. No more voicemail messages, but I know their number.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1104947290104272532005-01-05T13:40:00.000-05:002005-01-05T12:55:56.843-05:00

The other night I dreamt I was scheduled to surrender for federal jail time but kept putting it off on technicalities. Jodie Foster was one of the federal agents who tried to coax me into submitting to the agreed to jail term. She even had a cuff on me at some point, but I fenagled my way out of the situation. Anothyer federal agent, a brother of my friend, convinced me through false

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1104850198006896722005-01-04T09:38:00.000-05:002005-01-04T09:49:58.006-05:00

I got my 18 bucks change back from the corporate caffeine war machine this morning. Before collecting it I checked high and low and mentally ran through every financial transaction I went through over the preceding 24 hours. So I got my eighteen bucks. I am just not sure if it was worth having to trade over my self righteous indignation for it. Certainly wasn't worth the death glare I

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1104790245121241932005-01-03T17:09:00.000-05:002005-01-03T17:10:45.120-05:00

I'm going in to collect my $18 tomorrow morning.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1104764729933600212005-01-03T09:56:00.000-05:002005-01-03T17:09:46.356-05:00

I had three twenties when I went into Starbucks this morning. When I laid down the brand new twenty before the cashier with the sickly pallor of Kid-N-Play's Kid and pre-pig tail braids of Latrell Sprewell, I anticipated a groan of inconvenience when he realized he'd have to make change for a solo cup of coffee. The groan never came. He took the twenty and the other guy gave me the coffee

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1104329160199066112004-12-29T08:57:00.000-05:002004-12-29T09:06:00.200-05:00

The Cedar Tavern the staff works hard to keep you from sitting at a table. The downstairs staff wants to ship you upstairs and the upstairs staff surveys the empty room behind them, audibly sighs with annoyance and turns back to you asking if you sent up because downstairs was full. Do these people work for tips? Are they paid by the number of people they turn away from an empty room?

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1104256640108396872004-12-28T13:49:00.000-05:002004-12-28T12:57:20.106-05:00

"You wanna come over my house and watch wrestling tonight?" "Tell him he can come over and we can watch wrestling like a big happy family like we usedta." "He's such a fuckin' asshole. He could do so much beddah den haah!" "Hello [to a BestBuy representative]? Hi. Maybe you can help me. I wanted to know if you could tell me if you got any Twilight Zone DVD's. How much are they?"

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1104247888137701102004-12-28T10:30:00.000-05:002004-12-28T10:31:28.136-05:00

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100930585179374442004-11-20T01:03:00.000-05:002004-11-20T01:03:05.180-05:00

The Knicks had to draft Frederic Weiss instead of this walking hometown NYPost headline? 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100916472194514972004-11-19T20:50:00.000-05:002004-11-19T21:13:57.236-05:00

The brilliant blue eye-girl with the double-stroller was on the train again this evening. They aren't contacts. She's lilly-white and the stroller occupants seem to be fathered by a black man. She gets some interesting hurtful look-aways and hisses from the other female passengers as she rides the last car on the downtown 4 on Friday evenings. A couple of weeks ago, when I first noticed them,

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100914789553603452004-11-19T20:28:00.000-05:002004-11-19T20:50:33.933-05:00

A Lad o' the O'Friels by Seumas MacManus is at moments pure joy. As such, it has on at least three occasions lifted me to a lofty perch of egghead reader euphoria far far above the hostility and anger surrounding me on the Bronx bound 4. Unfortunately, my attempts to recapture this bookish bliss on my early eveing jaunts back to Manhattan are constantly thwarted by fried chicken flatulence,

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100912994223930982004-11-19T20:09:00.000-05:002004-11-19T20:09:54.223-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100912881205966002004-11-19T20:08:00.000-05:002004-11-19T20:08:01.206-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100912838158705822004-11-19T20:07:00.000-05:002004-11-19T20:07:18.156-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100912683142708022004-11-19T20:04:00.001-05:002004-11-19T20:04:43.143-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100912642803113472004-11-19T20:04:00.000-05:002004-11-19T20:04:02.803-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100912584293980102004-11-19T20:03:00.000-05:002004-11-19T20:03:04.293-05:00

bad hats 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100912547747952312004-11-19T20:02:00.000-05:002004-11-19T20:02:27.746-05:00

mo bad hats 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100848391171214292004-11-19T01:56:00.000-05:002004-11-19T02:30:51.113-05:00

Tonight as I sat listening to Josey Wales growl about his cowboy style and modify his coffin order a mouse tip-toed out of the kitchen, seemed to see me, went back into the kitchen, came back out, did not seem to see me (maybe he just heard me at first and then got confused by the reggae bass). He eluded me as I turned to slip on my Israeli knockoff berkenstocks to stomp him. Luckily he

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100847387713931192004-11-19T01:54:00.000-05:002004-11-19T01:56:27.713-05:00

"They 'onna offer me a job, so I'm 'onn' haffa see wassup. They company mergering..."

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100779151462023692004-11-18T06:59:00.000-05:002004-11-18T06:59:11.463-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100779107235057012004-11-18T06:58:00.000-05:002004-11-18T06:58:27.236-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100741817365449852004-11-17T20:16:00.000-05:002004-11-17T20:36:57.366-05:00

The kids selling candy on the subway used to lie and claim to be raising funds to support a ghetto basketball leagues. Now they just say they want money to stay off the street and out of trouble. The Monday morning mobs of Spanish ladies and homeboys clumsily passing out free newspapers outside the 4 train exit on 42nd and Lex is so thick you have to fight to get into the train. The rest of

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100577686475696402004-11-15T23:01:00.000-05:002004-11-15T23:01:26.476-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100577647995829602004-11-15T23:00:00.000-05:002004-11-15T23:00:47.996-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100577599987692272004-11-15T22:59:00.001-05:002004-11-15T22:59:59.986-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100577544656805272004-11-15T22:59:00.000-05:002004-11-15T22:59:04.656-05:00

 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100577469286462772004-11-15T22:57:00.000-05:002004-11-15T22:57:49.286-05:00

Coney Island Romulans 

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100536543281910392004-11-15T11:26:00.000-05:002004-11-15T22:56:18.376-05:00

After a long weekend, I got back into my apartment exhausted on Sunday night. I suddenly remembered that several days before, I was invited to "go on the drink" with a Mancunian friend to celebrate his birthday. I felt bad about never getting back to him, so I composed a brief belated birthday greeting and sent it with my apologies via phone-text. Two smarmy passive agressive replies worthy

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100048865445469942004-11-09T19:52:00.000-05:002004-11-09T20:07:45.446-05:00

I'm not the first to say this, but I have noticed alot of shiny new Boston hats since the World Series. This bothers me. These are not the prevalent Boston hats worn by Washington Heights residents or the grimy never washed hats that make Gabe Kapler's hat look brand new that are typically worn by goofy young self-righteous die0hard fan white guy types. These are the hats worn by the front

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1100047894776426362004-11-09T19:45:00.000-05:002004-11-09T19:51:34.776-05:00

My friend ran the marathon and didn't tell me. In fact he lied to me when I directly asked him if he was running. I could've stood on a corner somewhere for a few hours and waited to yell insults at him at his most vulnerable time. I feel ripped off.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1099917831547840522004-11-08T07:38:00.000-05:002004-11-08T07:43:51.546-05:00

I haven't seen NY1 since the king of late night Asian Pop music listening moved in next store and ordered cable, somehow disabling my Brighton Beach organizatziya box. If they're still doing New Yorker of the Week segments, they should focus less on do-gooders and more on local characters, like the guy who spends his evenings sweeping up cigarette butts on 9th Avenue between 39th and 40th.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1099917487572863702004-11-08T07:37:00.000-05:002004-11-08T07:38:07.573-05:00

I'll miss TJ Keane's.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1099917031486734072004-11-08T07:25:00.000-05:002004-11-08T07:30:31.486-05:00

"You be riding horses? You like horses? I ain't never rode no horses. What's it like to ride horses? You like horses? They go fast, horses? They be going fast, right?" said the aging prostitute to the John as her hand massaged the front of his pants.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1099916700059861342004-11-08T07:15:00.000-05:002004-11-08T07:25:00.060-05:00

Traditionally the onset of the commercial Christmas season was signaled by ads for Child World toystore during WWOR's annual airing of Mighty Joe Young and Godzilla movies on Thanksgiving. Macy's whipped the kiddies into a consumer frenzy by sponsoring a parade of balloon cartoon characters followed by Santa in case anybody mistook the parade for a thanksgiving celebration. Now the Holiday

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1099484392031543962004-11-03T07:09:00.000-05:002004-11-03T07:19:52.030-05:00

Boston, as usual, got it wrong. They were supposed to lose in baseball and win the presidential election.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1099414922672133262004-11-02T11:57:00.000-05:002004-11-02T12:02:02.673-05:00

She was doing her best. She flipped the double-sided pages covered in six point font back and forth, but could not locate my address. She was NOT joking when tshe told me she was blind in one eye and couldn't see well out the other. This country needs vibrant young competent adequately-sighted people to sign up as poll workers.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1098789220608141862004-10-26T07:12:00.000-04:002004-10-26T07:13:40.606-04:00

Ronan Tynan can't hold a candle to you, Rob.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1096988502618257962004-10-05T10:08:00.000-04:002004-10-05T11:01:42.616-04:00

When I have nothing to say I just need to go to the laundromat. Where there are suds and quarters there are weirdos to describe. Last time I was confronted by an angry recently released self proclaimed religious muslim brother (oh, coolly cool, aki! You mean "muslim brother" like the brothers that hate me for my blue eyes or muslim brother like the brothers that are lopping heads off the

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1096406010979543552004-09-28T16:58:00.000-04:002004-09-28T17:13:30.980-04:00

I went in to the grocery store for a six pack. There were two Aussie or Kiwi guys blocking the beer fridge. They stood there excitedly surveying the beer selection. They were big and burly with a pepped up "Dude, Where's My Car" aura glowing about them. Because I am a weirdo that didn't want to talk to Men at Work fratboys, I did a circuit of the store and picked up a few other items

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1096181363634224372004-09-26T02:32:00.000-04:002004-09-26T02:49:23.633-04:00

What ever happened to Wetlands? Office building? Enormo Deli? Luxury Condos? I used to dred the stoned hippie grunge-o crowd in the pillow room, but I kinda miss the kitschy Colt quart sales. I once convinced security I got my Miller 40 at the bar.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1096179569050941712004-09-26T02:18:00.000-04:002004-09-26T02:25:38.926-04:00

One of the most exciting young talents to arise out of the '80s dancehall scene, Garnett Silk began his career as a child toaster, but ended it as one of Jamaica's most astonishing singers; with a rich and emotive voice, he took the nation by storm. He seemed destined for international stardom, when his career was cut cruelly short by his death in 1994. Born Garnett Damoin Smith in Jamaica's

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6396165.post-1096080322792067002004-09-24T22:39:00.000-04:002004-09-24T22:45:22.793-04:00

My neighbor, a dude in his mid-20's, was listening to a Madonna remix tonight when I went out for smokes after the Yankee game. I'll draw no conclusions and hope he does the same when he hears Peggy Lee vocals coming from my closed door.

bronx expatnoreply@blogger.com0